I haven’t written about it since this, but my foot is still hurting and now it’s at every step. The pain has migrated from the side of the base of my big toe to, oh, somewhere between the middles of the first and second metatarsals. I have no idea if this is characteristic of bunions or if the problem is someting else entirely, but it hurts. And I think it’s hurting worse. Saturday I didn’t walk much all day because I has hanging out in the apartment with the handymen fixing our TV cable and running hot water to the washer. Then when we went out at night, it hurt worse. Sunday I walked quite a lot, down by the river and through the city and then up to the mall, and by evening my foot was not only sore but also a bit swollen.

I’ve given up on waiting for my health insurance to come through, not because it’s delayed – it seems to be on track – but because I have a trip to the Netherlands next week and I don’t want to wait until I get back to see a doctor. So I have an appointment for tomorrow in a private clinic. (And hopes for a doctor who speaks good English.)

The foot only hurts when I step onto it, varying from minor ache to YOUCH! I can’t figure out what makes it hurt more or less, except that some shoes are worse than others and whenever I stumble and twist it a bit it hurts like a mofo. I think what bothers me is not so much the actual pain as that it’s making me walk oddly – I’m worried I’ll hurt something else that way – and mostly the entire idea of it. I don’t do illness and injury, never have except of the most minor sort. The only two surgeries I’ve had were outpatient; I was back to school after the weekend for the wisdom teeth and to work the day after the cryosurgery. I’ve never had stitches (other than the wisdom teeth) or a broken bone, never had a cast or a crutch, never had worse than a bit of a sprained ankle or stiff neck. Fond of change as I am, this is one of the parts of my life that I would really prefer to keep the same.

Also, I walk like I’m old right now. Don’t like that idea at all.

If the doctor says it will keep hurting like this for a while then go away on its own, I’ll be OK with that. I’ll even deal if I just need to stay off it a bit (though crutches or one of these would definitely make getting through the airport interesting). But if this is one of those things that will definitely eventually require surgery, I might need to push them into it right away, so I can get back to whole as soon as possible. I’m actually betting on “it will go away eventually”, because that’s been my total experience with doctors so far, but I am hopng they can tell me what the problem is and how to fix or prevent it.