Usually I write here about the cultural differences I find endearing or entertaining, but I encountered one yesterday that was, as the Dutch would say, not so nice.
We have a new Toastmasters chapter here at work. Last night we had our charter ceremony, and I was in charge of setting up the meeting schedule as well as serving as Language Evaluator (I get to criticize and commend pronunciation, grammar and word choice) and Table Topics Session Master (Table Topics are short impromptu speeches, in response to a question posted by the Session Master).
As part of the ceremony, we had the site General Manager speaking – our top guy at this location. He’s an excellent speaker himself, with native or near-native fluency in both Chinese and English, and gave a good presentation on how giving a good speech is like preparing a Chinese banquet (because presentation, sensory details and content are all important.
The problem is that he began with a “joke” about the importance of communication: “Q. What’s the difference between your wife and a terrorist? A. You can negotiate with the terrorist.”
No, I didn’t think it was funny either.
Apparently the Toastmaster VIP guests in front of me did, though. I’ve asked a couple of my coworkers who were there last night, and while they don’t seem to have found it terribly side-splitting, they weren’t offended either. (One just said, “Well, it was to illustrate his point, about how important communication is.”
I’m still debating whether to say something to the GM, but probably won’t as he’s known to not take criticism well. If I thought I wasn’t the only one offended I’d definitely say something – as it is, I may still just mention that it not a great idea to make jokes like that to a mixed and international audience.
Yuck. ~LA
I’ve heard/seen that “joke” a number of times here in the States over the years (and, in trying to Google for its provenance just now, saw a variation where “Jewish mother” was listed instead of “wife”), so the cultural difference I see here is not Asian vs. Western but politically considerate vs. good ol’ boy. Not that I have any clue how to address it in either case.