Busy week – last night we rowed, today we’re going over someone’s house for dinner, tomorrow we go look at apartments, Friday afternoon Ted leaves. We’ve been having unusually hot weather here, getting up as high as the upper 80s. I don’t have A/C, but fortunately it’s still down to 60 or so at night.
I know what’s going to happen, though: I predict the weather turns cold right after Ted leaves. Or in other words, just when I don’t have a nice warm man around anymore. (Sure enough: the forcast predicts Firday to be our hottest day, cooling down over the weekend.)
Still working on the housebuying, papers back and forth every few days. Having done it twice, I knew that there were a *lot* of papers to sign when you buy a house, but I hadn’t realized how much the process is slanted toward the seller, especially if the seller is a bank. It was probably a lot less obvious when all we had to do was go to an office and sign a bunch of papers; now that every signature is an ordeal (receive document, print, sign, scan, email – and do it all twice when Ted and I are in different countries) it’s a lot more obvious. They can delay and waste time with impunity, for instance, while requiring us to return every signed document in 24 hours despite our difficulties in doing so and our timezone issues. I had thought the events of the last two years had forced banks into better treatment of their customers, but apparently not.
Also, it’s possible I have higher expectations now for how a business should operate than I did in 1997, last time we bought a house. I have a strong enough sense of my own value now that I have less tolerance for being jerked around than I did when I was younger. That also comes with enough appreciation of the value of everyone else that I don’t think anyone buying a house should be jerked around, either, even if you’re a first-time buyer.
I don’t see how it’s good business practice to make things difficult for someone to give you large amounts of money. In our case don’t have to buy this house; not only do we not need to buy this particular house, we don’t actually need to buy a house at all. We’ve come very close to dropping out of this purchase because of all the hoops they’re making us jump through. This is a very nice house on a beautiful lake and we think it will be a good investment for us, but our time and energy have value to us as well as our money .. and the more demands you make on the first two, the less likely you are to get the third.
On a totally different topic (or rather, one that’s related only by the concept of the worth of everyone) you don’t need to be an American expat to appreciate RM’s latest post, but experiences of the last few years made it hit home all the more for me. I actually agree with the post she’s responding to, about the glory and the importance of the American Dream; I just can’t ignore the fact that it’s not (yet!) a reality for all Americans, don’t think living as if it were current reality is the way to get there, and don’t think that pretending we’re all alike is of much value to any of us or to the US as a whole. I’ve come to appreciate that Canadian metaphor of the mosaic rather than the melting pot.