August 21, 2001

the Youngest Brother and the Psychobitch

Some background:

My friends L and S are considerably older than me; they live down the block from my parents and I babysat their sons until I went off to college. (The "children" have recently graduated college themselves.) L,
especially, was like a big sister to me, and their house was a refuge that every
adolescent needs. We've stayed in touch, and L was matron of honor in my wedding, while S, a semi-serious musician, made the wedding rehearsal memorable by playing blues for us on his harmonica.

L's youngest brother is a year or two older than I am. We were in the same math class one year in high school. We never dated or anything, but we used to wrestle a lot. Put whatever spin on that you want -- I never quite figured it out. We also played a lot of pinochle with L, S, their parents, and sometimes their other brother and sister-in-law. It was my first experience with a family who actively enjoyed each other's company. We were fairly good friends through high school and college, and even corresponded during his military hitch.

By the time he got out of the Air Force, I'd graduated and moved to Texas, but we still kept in touch. He was getting a bit lonely by then and signed up for a dating service. Though his other brother's wonderful wife is Catholic and gets along extremely well with his family, he told me he didn't want to date anyone who wasn't Jewish. Then he promptly met a Catholic woman, presumably fell in love, and got married. [1]

Well, over the next couple of years she manifested her true horridness, doing her best to try to pull him away from his family. One year when I sent them a combination Chanukah/Christmas card (I thought it was humorous, and it was certainly far more innocuous than the cards he'd used to send to me), the wife returned it with nasty comments. She became an agoraphobe and pretty much avoided any kind of consistency or rationality. Things got a little better for a while after they had a daughter, once she realized his family was good for free babysitting.

A couple of years ago, though, L and S started telling me they (the Youngest Brother and the Psychowife) were making loads of crank phone calls to them and signing them up for all kinds of magazines, not to mention anti-Semitic and KKK literature. After a decade together, it seems the psycho-ness is rubbing off on him too.

S just sent me a news clipping about a suit they are now in. The Youngest Brother and the Psychowife have been persecuting a local doctor's office in similar ways, and they, L, and S have joined to prosecute. I find this all terribly sad because the family used to be so close, and because I always liked the Youngest Brother, in his pre-wife days. Possibly mental illness is involved; I confess I don't understand people who are irrational, people who go from calm and laid back to rabid, or a Jew who would send religious slurs to his own family. I feel awful for L and S and their sons, and even worse for their parents.

[1]My own brother, known here as My Brother the Writer, did something similar -- telling me he wanted to date only Jewish women and then promptly falling in love with someone who was raised Catholic. However, he has shown much better taste, as far as I can tell. Though I've only spoken to her via phone and email, his girlfriend seems to be wonderful.

Posted by dichroic at August 21, 2001 04:59 PM
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